


Scars

by Tillyalf427



Category: Corpse Party (Video Game), Corpse Party: Tortured Souls
Genre: Anxiety, Developing Relationship, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Hugs, Hurt/Comfort, Self-Doubt, Self-Hatred
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-17
Updated: 2020-03-17
Packaged: 2021-03-01 01:33:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,147
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23187073
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tillyalf427/pseuds/Tillyalf427
Summary: Graduation has come around after Heavenly Host, only, Ayumi is struggling to come to terms with everything...
Relationships: Kishinuma Yoshiki/Shinozaki Ayumi
Kudos: 18





	Scars

**Author's Note:**

> I've not written for this pairing in agggeesss and although I do love me some Satoshiki, I also have a huge soft spot for Ayushiki so I wrote this :)))))

At the start of high school, Ayumi's thoughts had always been set on graduation. She was there to get good grades and graduate then move on to a prestigious university to do illustration. Although, things change and almost a month ago, Ayumi never would have thought she would even make it to graduation. After the events of Heavenly Host and her own ignorance and stupidity at the Shinozaki estate, she had struggled to find a reason to carry on. She had ruined every good thing she had in life, from her dearest friends to her caring sister.

She had lost it all.

Not only that but it had all been through her own fault.

There had been plenty of times when she had been in the hospital following the book of shadows incident where she would take a late-night walk up to the roof to look at the stars, hoping to see some sort of sign that her friends and sister were alright somewhere else only to end up letting her thoughts drift, eventually finding herself being dragged away from the railing around the open expanse with a strong grip.

She would always regain control over her own thoughts, seeing either a friendly nurse or a stern-looking Yoshiki staring down at her wide-eyed and concerned, to which she would insist she was fine and promise that she wasn't going to do anything.

They had all been empty promises at the time.

Winter had come to an end, the dreary weather subsiding to reveal bright spring sun which shone through the windows of Ayumi's bedroom, illuminating her reflection in the full-length mirror as she stared blankly at the glass.

At the start of high school, Ayumi had been dead set on graduating with flying colours. Then after Heavenly Host, graduation became the last thing on her mind, focusing solely on staying alive, forcing herself to live, for her remaining friends and the ones who had passed. And now, she never thought she would be staring in the mirror, the morning of graduation, willing herself to move from her bedroom.

Up until now, she had kept the large scars on her neck and limbs covered up, simply re-bandaging them even long after they had healed as she found herself unable to bear the sight of them, however, it was graduation day and the school had set out strict uniform policies to adhere to which, unfortunately for her, didn't include layers upon layers of bandages to hide her own mistakes, now scarred into her skin.

Seeing as the wounds had healed long ago, she had no valid excuse to still wear the bandages covering them, even more so as she would be standing on stage for a speech as the class rep of 2-9. All of this had led her here. Her eyes constantly returning to the pink-ish runic letters inscribed in her legs and neck, the ones on her arms having been covered by her uniform.

She could feel her stomach churning and was silently thankful that she hadn't eaten yet, feeling phantom pain radiating from the scars where the saw blades had dug deep into her flesh.

The ticking of the clock was constant however, she refused to check the time, not willing to break her trance and face the real world just yet, instead, she ran a finger across one of the lines which made up the letters, flinching hard at the contact and managing to surprise even herself with the intensity.

She froze when she heard a knock on the door, managing to make out the faint, familiar voices talking in the hallway before her mother called her name tentatively, fully aware how fragile her youngest daughter had become in the past few months.

"Ayumi?"

She took a breath. Held it for one, two, three, before releasing it again, feeling no better than she did before so deciding to try again as her mother called out again, quieter and more cautious.

"Ayumi? Your friends are here..."

Again, she took a deep breath, focusing on the rhythmic ticking of the clock hands, getting closer and closer to when she had to leave and tried desperately to not let her eyes wander to the scars which sometimes haunted her dreams.

Or more, how they came into existence.

More muffled talking blurred into the background of her thoughts as she tried her hardest to just _move._ Just _one step_ towards the door. Only, that door became occupied by another figure, too tall to be her mother and too young and lanky looking to be her father. 

She didn't even need to turn her head to know who it was, letting the silent tears she didn't know she had been holding fall down her cheeks without any more hesitation.

"Kishi...numa.." She managed to choke out, trying to remain quiet so as to not alert her mother that something was wrong.

The blond said nothing, for now, simply moving closer and opening his arms without hesitation like he had done so many times before.

Ayumi let the tears fall, trying not to lean into the blond's touch too much for fear of messing up his own uniform which she noted was tidier than usual, showing the blond had actually tried to make an effort.

Everything still felt so fresh, like Heavenly Host had happened mere days ago. It never got easier no matter what. And now it was as if the scars from her failed attempt to fix things were laughing at her, mocking her for being unable to fix what she had broke. 

"They should be here..." Ayumi sobbed, clenching a fist in Yoshiki's shirt "If only I'd have gotten that stupid spell right they might be here!" Her voice was practically a wail now and her hand which wasn't gripping onto Yoshiki dug its nails into her leg, right on top of the scarred flesh.

"Hey," Yoshiki managed to grab her attention for a moment, taking her hand which had left deep imprints on her leg from her nails where she had been clawing at the scar there "Shinozaki, believe me, we would all change this if we could but unfortunately there's nothing any of us can do. I hate to say this but all we can do is move on,"

The only reply he received was a louder sob, her hand gripping his hand now as he removed hers from her leg.

"I don't know if I can do this..."

Yoshiki took a moment to consider his next words carefully as he heard Ayumi continue.

"Everyone's going to see them...They're going to remember the others and it's all my fault...That they're gone..."

It was just like when she had been in hospital. If it hadn't been for Yoshiki, she wouldn't be here right now. As much as she hated relying on someone so much, she needed him in these moments. She needed someone to knock some sense into her again, whether it be theoretically or physically.

Which is what Yoshiki did, reaching up and flicking her forehead.

"Shinozaki, listen to me, you didn't intend for any of this to happen so how can you be blamed?" His voice was filled with frustration but it seemed to get through to her "None of us blame you so why do you? You tried your best to get us out of that place and went even further by trying to bring everyone back, no one could ask for more. Now I'm sorry but there is no way I'm letting you miss this. I know you and I know you would never have wanted to miss graduation,"

Ayumi glanced up with teary eyes, confusion clear in her glassy eyes however, it was short-lived as she felt another set of arms wrapping around her, hearing Naomi behind her.

"You used to talk about how much you looked forward to graduation," The brunette's voice was quiet as she spoke, however, Ayumi heard her clearly "I'm with Kishinuma on this one, we're not letting you miss this," 

And again, another set of arms as Satoshi joined what had now become a group hug, also adding words of encouragement.

"You've been there for us since we got back from that school, now we're going to do the same for you,"

Ayumi moved to bury her face in Yoshiki's shirt once more, hating appearing so weak in front of her friends but seemingly unable to stop it no matter how hard she tried.

"Shinozaki," Yoshiki grabbed her attention once again and she briefly glanced up before averting her eyes again. "You're the only reason I've made it to graduation...If it wasn't for you I would've punched that damn teacher and gotten expelled but...you gave me a reason to stay in school so I'm not going to let you miss the one thing you used to look forward to. And I'm not going back on my promise either, if anyone even thinks to blame you for anything, I'll protect you,"

Both Naomi and Satoshi stayed quiet and Ayumi looked up to make eye contact with Yoshiki, managing to give a weak smile and a nod.

"I'll...try," Her voice was hoarse as she spoke, feeling three pairs of arms tightening around her "For you guys," She added as an afterthought.

"You'll do great Shinozaki," Satoshi encouraged, to which she felt Naomi nodding enthusiastically.

"We'll be cheering for you,"

With a strengthened resolve, Ayumi forced a smile onto her face, reaching up to scrub the tears away from her eyes as her friends released her, each giving her encouraging smiles.

"What are we waiting for then?" she asked, trying her best to joke as they all began leaving for school.

The assembly began almost as soon as they arrived, having only just made it by mere moments and they each headed to their respective seats, Ayumi having to split from the rest of the group to prepare for her speech. Before she left, they all gave her words of encouragement and reassuring smiles, managing to boost her confidence enough that she didn't even flinch at the curious stares focussed on the scars across both her thighs, managing to reach her seat without her legs shaking too badly.

It was when she got up once more, ready to head up on stage that she felt her shaking return, anxiety flooding throughout her body. She somehow managed to force herself up the stairs at the side of the stage, eyes scanning over the crowds of students sat in the audience, searching for three people in particular. She spotted Naomi and Satoshi fairly easily, however, the seat beside Satoshi was empty and she couldn't find Yoshiki anywhere upon searching the crowd once more. Taking a deep breath did nothing to calm her nerves as she took one last look for Yoshiki before her name was called, summoning her to do her speech.

It was now or never she supposed.

And so, with one last deep breath, she headed on to the stage, shaking hands clutching the flashcards she had written her speech on before taking the microphone when it was offered to her.

She began her speech unsurely, focusing on where Naomi and Satoshi sat with the hope that Yoshiki would appear once again, calming her nerves in the way only he seemed to be able to do.

Only he didn't appear. 

Instead, as she was beginning her speech, she saw her two friends gesturing to their left, much to her confusion. She tried subtly scanning the crowd once more, trying to retain focus on her speech at the same time however, there was no-one there. Upon glancing back, she saw Naomi mouthing something to her however, she couldn't quite make out what she was saying, eyes flicking between the card in her hand and the brunette. 

It was purely by chance that she spotted a mop of blond hair in her peripheral vision, turning her head slightly to see Yoshiki hiding behind one of the stage curtains, flashing her a reassuring grin and a cheesy thumbs up.

Struggling to contain a fond smile, she continued her speech with renewed vigour, feeling the blond's stare locked on her.

When she did eventually finish, there was a round of applause as she left the stage, practically throwing herself at Yoshiki who was still waiting behind the curtain. Of course, the blond caught her easily, holding her tight in his arms as he let out a long, slow breath.

"Thank you...Yoshiki...For everything," Ayumi didn't even seem to realise she had used the blond's first name however, he didn't care, letting himself enjoy this feeling for a little longer.

And Ayumi, well, she simply enjoyed the blond's embrace for a while, eternally grateful that they had both made it out alive to be able to experience this moment.


End file.
